Fragments
by KyoKyon
Summary: ...Fragments make a whole piece...
1. From Kagome to No One

She must have loved flowers. After all, which small girl did not love the gentle beings?

The dead daisy held tightly in her hand was also another indicator. Brushing aside her dark bangs, she allowed a brief moment for grief's door to open.

An unknown child lost forever to her parents and all who loved her; now lay dead in the dark forest.

She had been walking towards the river for her nightly ritual, cleansing herself of the day's journey. Somehow, this nightly privacy always gave her time to clear her head, for her to really feel without needing to think. To always think about how to feel was awful. Here, she could think with freedom.

Freedom of thought.

Ironic.

Walking along the dark path, the leaves beneath her crunching, she tread carefully, not wanting to trip over something and break her ankle. She could hear Inuyasha's reaction to THAT piece of news.

_You're so damn clumsy! Can't you even walk? Kik-_

Swallowing that mouthful of hurt, she pushed that thought away. Thoughts on Inuyasha always made her feel like she was rubbing salt into her fresh wound. Her thoughts were cut off brutally when she broke into the clearing.

_No, no…_

Slowly, a step at time, she approached the small figure. Her knees gave way as she fell in an ungraceful heap on the ground.

She was a very pretty girl.

Dark haired and fair. Freckles covered her cheekbone and her face was also smudged.

Dark blood marred her hands and the dirty daisy she had been carrying. Her kimono was torn and she could see the ravages of the body. Feeling sick, she tucked the kimono in, hiding the gruesome sight of her hanging intestine and gore.

The sick feeling passed and sadness was left in its after wake.

Sadness for this unknown girl hidden far away from her family.

_She must have gone to look for flowers or maybe she had been lured here by the spring brook. How long had she been lying here, dead and uncaring?_

The ground was hard but she struggled with it, bending it to her will. Kagome Higurashi was no weakling.

Grimly, she dug on, using her bare hands and the stick. When a hole deep enough had been dug, she gently carried the little girl and laid her down inside. In the moonlit night, she could make out the tear streaks.

_She must have been so frightened. To suddenly feel the warm gush of your blood and not understanding the creature who broke her. To be left all alone here, in the dark, as you grew weaker and weaker. To wonder "why me?" and never receive enlightenment. To hang on and pray to be saved. To have cried all those useless tears for something you couldn't understand. To be so alone when you were dying. _

_No one deserved to die all alone, least alone a child. A wandering youkai or a human? Blood lust in human beings were more frightening than in a youkai. _

Kneeling by the fresh mound, she placed a small flower there. Placing her palms together, she softly mouthed, "Rest in peace and may your soul find eternal peace…"

Kagome looked back once as she left the clearing, dirt stuck in her nails and smeared on her knees. The grave looked so lonely. One more life gone in this harsh but beautiful world.

And as Kagome turned to walk to the spring, a fleeting thought passed through.

_I hope she wasn't scared._

Life was indeed a fleeting dream.


	2. From Kagome to Shikon No Tama

_It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing._

_- The Invitation, Orion Mountain Dreamer_

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any of its characters.

………………………………………..

_From Kagome to Inuyasha_

The pain still lingered, rubbing on her already sore heart.

Another argument.

Another day.

Refusing to give in to the urge to cry, she clenched her teeth and strode off proudly, determined not to let him see the tears he so freely inspired.

Grass trampled, leaves torn from their homes ruthlessly as the lithe figure passed by.

_Stupid Inuyasha, BAKA!_

The tears which refused to fall then now flowed freely, streaming down her cheeks in torrent. Wiping them as fast as they would flow, Kagome made her way towards the only sanctuary which was available to her now.

The well.

Home.

A bittersweet feeling enveloped her as she caught sight of the old well. Every time they had a fight, she would end up storming off and going back home, to drown herself in the 'normal-ness' of her world.

No Inuyasha to call her bitch, no Inuyasha to hurt her sightless with his words. No Inuyasha to…

Kagome stopped at the well, looking down with tired eyes. She was always running away. And yet her heart compelled her to choose that path. Running away came naturally.

Sitting herself on the edge of the well, she took a deep breath, calming herself down. Looking down at her hands, she slowly traced the calluses and the scars on it. Like a map, she traced its journey.

She had spent a year in the feudal world. A year of living in terror, danger, heartache, tears and loneliness. Without her family, without her friends, without an ounce of knowledge of this strange new world. For a responsibility that had been wrenched and then laid bleeding into her hands.

The Shikon No Tama.

Kagome touched the crystals that hung around her neck in a vial. The warm feeling that gently nudged her cold fingers made her sigh again.

Yet…

Life was never this pessimistic.

She chose to be with Inuyasha, despite knowing that he still loved Kikyo.

_He wasn't the only one who couldn't let go_, she thought with a wry grin.

A year filled with bitter arguments, words that cut like the sharpest knives and a sea of endless longing and tears.

And for a moment, Kagome felt like throwing the fragile glass vial into the shadows of the forest.

_Take that! I don't care! I'm going back home and I'm never coming back! I wish I never met you, Inuyasha!_

And all the hurt he ever caused her, all those tears that flowed for him will be erased. She could live happily back in her world, indulging herself, hiding herself, losing herself…

The hand tightened on the glass vial with deadly strength but then relaxed and fell limply on her lap.

She couldn't…

No matter how much hurt he ever caused her, she still wanted this.

She wanted to be close to him. She still wanted to know that deep down inside, she mattered to him. She KNEW she mattered and that was enough for her.

"_You are a cursed thing. I lived 15 years of my life with you inside me before evil decided to appear in my life. Yet, you are a curse that I would gladly take upon me again and again. You caused me great pain yet I never knew joy like this before. You gave me terror but you left me with appreciation. You bathed me in tears yet you gave me another sea of warmth and love. You gave me a family to call my own; people who I cannot bear to see die. A mother, a child, a friend…You gave me the chance to experience all these emotions. I do not know whether I want to cast you in the deepest part of the sea or leave you be, living within me. Somewhere inside me, I will always curse you and hold you tight, least you should cast me back into the world I was born unto."_

Another day, another argument, another resolve.

And with that thought, Kagome resisted the urge to look back as she jumped inside the well, letting it envelope her into the warm embrace of magic.


	3. New Year Prayers

_I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own, if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human._

_- Orion Mountain Dreamer, The Invitation_

…………………………

As disclaimed earlier, Inuyasha does not belong to me.

………………………..

New Year was around the corner.

Kagome shuffled towards her closet to retrieve her jeans and shirt, and then faltered as her eyes wandered off to the table where the Shikon No Tama lay seated inside the glass vial.

New Year bought good luck and that was the only time of the year where humans cast aside their shell of doubt and sent their heartfelt wishes towards the Gods. Somehow it seemed _wrong_ to go and pray in the shrine with only jeans and a shirt, despite the fact that the shrine was practically in her backyard.

A year ago, she would have been busy going out with her friends as they giggled over the minute happenings in school. She would have been drinking hot chocolate with Mama and Jiji while Souta sought to irritate the hell out of her.

But now, everything had changed.

Remembering the fight from earlier on, Kagome sighed. In a way, the coming New Year was to blame.

"_Come on, Inuyasha! Just 2 days! I promise to be back by 2 days!" Kagome had pleaded._

"_No! Stupid wench! Not when we're so close to kicking that damn Naraku's butt! He'll be back for the rest of the shards and he's so close! I can smell his filthy scent more than ever now!" Inuyasha snarled, his amber eyes flashing as he looked out at the vast forest._

"_New Year's around the corner, Inuyasha. Is it too much to ask for? It's been almost a week since we last saw him! We haven't even caught sight of Kagura! It means a lot to me…Please, Inuyasha?" Kagome pleaded again, hoping that she wouldn't have to use that word. _

_For a moment, something flashed in Inuyasha's eyes. Something akin to sadness but then it passed off as swiftly as it came._

"_No! Why can't you stay here and celebrate New Year here? You can just stay here and pray! Kikyou would never have thought of shirking her duty! All you think about is going back-"_

_Inuyasha never got to finish his words for they were eaten by the ground. The word echoed around the forest and the dust began to settle down again. Kagome stood there with the tears that was heavy on her lashes and looked down at the sad red heap._

"_I will be back in 2 days…"_

Unpleasant memories and more tears. That always resulted from their fights. Determined not to cry again, and secretly wondering if the tears would ever stop, she hit the showers.

Undressing, she left her pajamas on the floor of the bathroom, the cold tiles making her shiver. Winter was ending soon but the snow showed no signs of melting. Her heart longed for summer too soon.

Stepping into the warm water, she allowed the water to soak her through.

Last year, it had been a big deal for her. She had been a normal girl then but now she was changed. New Year took on a more important role.

Stepping out of the shower after almost 30 minutes, she dried off and wrapped the towel around herself.

The kimono waited for her on the bed, laid out and smelling faintly of moth balls and old perfume.

It had been a long time since she had dressed so formally and it took her some time to get ready properly.

Each knot was tied with precision; each crease was corrected with firm resolve.

Finally, she was done. Hair pinned up and the kimono was given one last check over. A simple blue kimono with sakura blossoms added at the bottom, it fit her to a tee.

Early morning on a wintry spring sent a shiver through her but she endured and made her way through the crisp snow towards the small shrine.

_Clap Clap Clap_

The sound echoed loudly in the empty shrine. Kagome stood there, her head bowed and her hands pressed together, eyes closed.

A feeling of peace settled inside her and she felt calm; a feeling she had always taken for granted.

_Kami-sama, I know that today is a bit early for New Year but I hope you will understand. Today, I come to you to pray for the well-being of my families; one of which I was born into and another which you bestowed upon me. _

_I try so hard to protect both of them but I know I am lacking._

_The final day seems so near and yet so far. I'm scared that I will somehow mess up and everything I ever loved will be gone, so please give me the strength to be strong and to be able to help them. _

The small figure of a girl looked beautiful as she looked into the old well. She gathered her kimono about her and threw down a large yellow bag and shortly after, jumped in herself.

Ah, New Year was indeed here.


End file.
